This is a list of songs which are banned from being played in the workplace. This list is for professional, public consumption, to be used by managers and leaders.
- "Achy Breaky Heart" by Billy Ray Cyrus - has been played enough times already
- "Baby, It's Cold Outside" by Frank Loesser - tobacco use
- "Baby Shark" - ceaseless stupidity
- "Cheeseburger in Paradise" by Jimmy Buffet - terrible song; glutony
- "Dark Horse" by Katy Perry - lazy songwriting with pedestrian and/or nonsensical lyrics that are simple, embarrassing prototypes of formulaic pop music that preys on people’s subconscious attachments to recognition of familiar melodies and vocal phrasings
- "Friday" by Rebecca Black - terrible song; inappropriate 6 out of 7 days
- "Hokey Pokey" - unsafe bodily movements
- "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" by Tommie Connor - suggestive themes; infidelity through collusion
- "I'm a Slave 4 U" by Britney Spears - suggestive themes
- "(I've had) The Time of My Life" by Bill Medley and Jennifer Warnes - suggestive themes
- "It's Five O'Clock Somewhere" by Alan Jackson and Jimmy Buffett - timezones; failure to comply with UTC
- Kid Rock; all songs - terrible
- "Know Your Enemy" by Rage Against The Machine - compromise, conformity, assimilation, submission, ignorance, hypocrisy, brutality, the elite; All of which are American dreams
- "My Heart Will Go On" by Celine Dion - suggestive themes; The Titanic
- "Never Gonna Give You Up" by Rick Astley - should not be played unironically; used only to harass coworkers
- "Pony" by Ginuwine - suggestive themes
- "Puff, the Magic Dragon" by Peter, Paul, and Mary - promoting opium consumption
- "Thong Song" by Sisqó - suggestive themes; mainly just about butts
- "What's New Pussycat?" by Tom Jones - retired; Associated John Mulaney story