20230604
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Two Irish hunters from Belfast hired a pilot to fly them to Canada to hunt moose.
They bagged six. As they started loading the plane for the return trip home, the pilot tells them the plane can take only three moose. The two Irishmen objected strongly, stating; Last year we shot six moose and the pilot let us put them all on board and he had the same plane as yours. Reluctantly, the pilot gave in and all six were loaded. Unfortunately, even on full power, the little plane couldn't handle the load and went down a few minutes after take off. Climbing out of the wreck, Paddy asked Mick, Any idea where we are? Mick replied, I think we're pretty close to where we crashed last year.
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True story
So my friend and I were at his place and for some reason argued about who was smarter than the other, so we decided to do an online IQ test. He went first, as he was sitting at the computer, while I looked on. He scored an impressive 120. Then it was my turn: 121. There was a moment of silence. Well, now we know who is smarter, I said. That's not fair, you got to look at my answers, protested my friend . Yes, that's because I'm smarter.
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A woman said to her husband: 'I just dreamt that you gave me a necklace of pearls. What do you think it means?'
The man smiled and said: You'll know tonight. That evening, the man came home with a small package which he gave to his wife. She embraced him, and then slowly and unwrapped the package. It contained a book entitled, The Meaning of Dreams.
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Man goes on vacation
An Illinois man left the snowballed streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail. Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher's wife, whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor dead. At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen: Dearest Wife, Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Your Loving Husband. PS: Sure is hot down here.